This is Me Waiting for our Group to Enter

A Cigar May Sometimes Just be a Cigar, but a Doggie is Never just a Doggie

I am not a Therapy Dog.  This, I can assure you, is not due to any lack of brilliance on my part; Mom is just not what you’d call a very structured kind of person. But this page is not about her. It’s about my work in our office.

Even though I am not properly trained, the amount of good work that gets done with me is substantial. Sometimes the effects of my work are immediately obvious. My intuition is astounding. Once, I jumped on someone’s lap just seconds before he realized that his blurred vision was not a headache, but a panic attack. I jumped on the lap of a woman who had just gotten very sad news; she had not even told Mom yet, but I knew…She’s been one of my best friends since then.

But most of the time, my work is far more subtle. Let’s talk about George. George is a smart, attractive young man who is very afraid to be in relationships with people. So he comes to Group every week. He fears that if he asks anything of the other group members, they will expect more back from him…more than he is willing or able to give. Several months ago, George noticed that I was coveting his pre-group pretzels. It was a little hard for him to miss this, as I am not very subtle in that way. He started giving me some, and then asked Mom what kinds of treats I usually ate.  Mom commented that George seemed pretty comfortable with the fact that I now expected him to come to Group with my favorite treats.  George acknowledged that this was true. Over time, he  began to ask more of the other group members, and to be less withholding from them.  

There have been inconsistencies in George’s treat-bringing behavior, and this has been a challenge for Mom, as she knows it’s important to explore, but does not want George to feel scolded when he doesn’t bring me treats.  There is a great deal that can be learned through the inconsistencies, and in general, through this relationship between me and George. Who am I to him? Am I a sibling? Am I a transitional object? Am I way for George to feel closer to Mom? to test her love?

In the world of Relational Group Therapy, this is all fascinating!  If you’d like to read more, you can read a brief article about our work with George at

http://guilfordjournals.com/doi/pdf/10.1521/ijgp.2015.65.1.115

And please feel free to engage me in conversations…with or without treats…preferably with…

This Dlog is dedicated to my Aunt Jill Riggles, who inspired its creation.